"Hands down this is the best day I can ever remember, yeah I'll always remember the sound of the stereo, the dim of the soft lights, the scent of your hair that you twirled in your fingers, and the time on the clock we realized it was so late, and the walk that we shared together. Yeah the streets were wet and the gate was locked, so I jumped it, and I let you in. And you stood at the door with your hand on my waist, and you kissed me like you meant it. And I know that you meant it."
-Dashboard Confessional

Wow, lets just say I had a lot of fun the other day. I don't want to say too much, and I don't want to get too hopeful because it was only a first date, but somehow I cant help but repeat that song lyric in my head over and over again. I don't know how this will turn out but for the first time in a while, im pretty damn happy.

Its funny when the things you avoid for so long, come back to you when you need them most. And then you realize, they arent so bad at all. At that point you find peace and the thing you avoided for so long now becomes a part of you.

Yes for the first time in a long time, I got a pair of glasses today. The actual order will be filled out soon and ill pick them up in about a week. For about 7 years I have been avoiding using glasses. Somehow in 8th grade me and my idiotic image obsessed self decided glasses were unnecessary and too nerdy. Now i realize, after the nerd look has become the new hot thing, and after 2 weeks of being forced to wear glasses since i ripped my last pair of contacts, that glasses somehow, at this point fit my style. So i got the sweetest pair in the story, which happened to be Oakleys.

But now that I am out of college, for now, I feel as if a burden has been lifted from my shoulders. I saw my great friend jonathan for the first time in a while, had lunch, and realized how much home (San Francisco) feels so good. The day afterward I went to work, had a great time with my friends their, and realized how much my managers loved having me back, so the feeling of me returning home is very much mutual. The next day I found myself hitting golf balls at the driving range (hitting golf balls and playing golf in general has to be the most theraputing thing I have ever done in my live) and hitting some amazing ironshots, and I loved the fact that I was playing golf, something I don't get to to in college. So for all of you who are miserable messes after leaving so many friends, I say, its okay, cheer up, and you'll realize and return to things in life that have always made you happy.

As for tomorrow, we shall see.....

I remember the look in your eyes
When I told you that this was goodbye
You were begging me not tonight
Not here, Not now.

We're looking up at the same night sky
And keep pretending the sun will not rise
Be together for one more night
Somewhere, Somehow

If I could find you know things would get better
We could leave this town and run forever
I know somewhere, somehow we'll be together
Let your waves crash down and take me away.

-Yellowcard

Goodbye for the summer. I'll miss you.

Where are you and I'm so sorry
I cannot sleep, I cannot dream tonight
I need somebody and always
This sick strange darkness
Comes creeping on so haunting everytime
And as I stared I counted
Webs from all the spiders
Catching thing and eating their insides
Like indecision to call you
And hear your voice of treason
Will you come home and stop this pain tonight
Stop this pain tonight.

Don't waste your time on me you're already
The voice inside my head (I miss you, I miss you)
Don't waste your time on me you're already
The voice inside my head (I miss you, I miss you)

- Blink-182

"Done, Done, and I'm on to the next one. Done, Done, and I'm on to the next one. Done, I'm Done, and I'm on to the next." -Foo Fighters

Hahahahaha! Finals are over and I don't think I could be much happier. I have my exodus from Berkeley pretty much planned out, and I can go home and get my old San Francisco life back. I get to hang out with my friends again, play catch in the park, beat everyone at poker, play golf with my brother and my cousin, catch a movie when I want. Its everything I need right now and then some. Its a three month escape from THE ASYLUM i call Berkeley. Yeah, now you know what the title of this blog means.

"I'll be seeing you in all the old familiar places."

To the friends I've made this year whom I won't be seeing in a few months. KEEP IN TOUCH BASTARDS!!!! Call me, IM me, E-Mail me anything. If you don't I'm gonna be back in 3 months bitter that you haven't said a damn thing. But most of all.....Thanks for being there, its been a hard semester and you folks (and you know who you are) have made it that much easier for me to take. And if you need anything, just ask!

And as for the tangled web of love and decetion we weave. And for the one who will not know until I'm good and ready. I have one simple thing to say. Don't Trip. If there is anything that has been made too much of around here, its this whole love and entanglement crap. I know, I've contributed to it myself, but if there's anything I've learned in playing this game called love, worrying about it just makes it worse. So take a little advice right here in this little quote from me:

"So let it be what it'll be, don't make a fuss and get crazy over you and me ... Its just a little crush, not like I faint every time we touch. It's just some little thing, not like everything I do depends on you" -Jennifer Paige

Again, this is my message to a lot of people. Good luck on the rest of your finals! Have a great memory filled summer! KEEP IN TOUCH BASTARDS! And be ready with a whole lot of stories to share when we meet up again!

And don't worry, you'll always have my blog to keep you company.

"Mama said there'd be days like this, there'd be days like this my mama said"  -a really old song lyric

Well for me its more like a week. Since Wednesday I've been cramming for finals. Thursday I crammed some more. Friday at noon, I beat my history final to a bloody pulp. Friday night I crammed for my Poli Sci Final. Saturday morning i beat my Poli Sci final, and i absolutely hope that I remembered to put my name on it. And then i went temporarily insane after that final. I could tell because in my sleep deprived state I started laughing incoherently at random things. We (as in i needed help to decide this...thanks you know who you are) decided that I needed to sleep. I slept. Woke up. And then realized I need to study for history on Monday......and thats in addition to my other issues. ITS BEEN A FUN WEEK!!!!!

Yet in the meantime, I'm making sure I keep perspective. I emailed some friends/politicial associates today. And making sure that im somewhat sane at the end of this Final exam week. So Ive basically turned into a busy body to avoid feelings that I don't need to feel. Speaking of feelings that I don't need to feel, I'd like to clarify a previous point. When I said I don't really feel the pain from crushes, I meant that I still feel the pain from crushes, its just that I know things aren't as bad as they could be. Its called keeping perspective. After years of being involoved in this game we call love, if theres one thing ive learned, it is that I have leaned how to keep perspective.....

"Won't you take me by the hand, take me some where new. I don't know who you are, but I...I'm with you." -Avril Lavigne (I believe thats how you spell it)

Well, okay, sometimes I lose perspective. Sometimes I thnk that I can have this wonderful disney like moment and just fall for someone head over heels. Sometimes I entertain the idea that I'm meant to be someone I just met, or even a friend ive known for a while. I'll admit that. But the bottom line is, in the end, I do have perspective. I some how try to make sense of it all in some rational manner. And somehow, I don't enjoy rationality and things making sense as much as I enjoy the idea of falling in love. But it sure hurts a lot less. I don't know. I might be wrong. And if you disagree, please comment, say something, interact with this blog, it will make things more fun for all of us.